In a revelation that has the dental community reeling, a recent study found that 75% of dentists actually prefer candy to toothpaste, debunking the age-old adage that dentists only endorse tooth-friendly products.
The groundbreaking study, conducted by the prestigious Brofessor Institute for Dental Hygiene and Snack Preferences, surveyed over 1,000 dentists across the nation. The results showed a startling preference for sugary treats over toothpaste, with many dentists admitting to consuming copious amounts of candy in secret.
Chad Bro, head of the Men of Culture and a connoisseur of tooth-rotting delights, was not surprised by the findings. "I always knew there was something fishy about those dentists," he said, smirking. "Now we know the truth - they're all just a bunch of sugar fiends!"
Gloria Shteinem chimed in with her thoughts on the matter: "This is a clear case of 'do as I say, not as I do.' It's time for dentists to come clean about their candy addiction."
Dentists everywhere have been scrambling to respond to the study's damning revelations. Dr. Cavity, a dentist from Toothopolis, issued a statement defending his colleagues: "Look, we're only human. Just because we recommend toothpaste to our patients doesn't mean we can't enjoy the occasional gummy bear or chocolate bar. But, uh, please don't tell our patients."
Lord Fluffington, Chad's discerning cat, responded to the news with a nonchalant flick of his tail, unimpressed by the sugary shenanigans of dental professionals.
As the dental community grapples with the implications of the study, the Men of Culture are taking the opportunity to poke fun at the situation. Chad has even proposed a new slogan for dental practices: "Three out of four dentists recommend candy. The fourth one is lying."
It seems that the world of dentistry may never be the same again, as the sweet truth behind their candy-loving ways continues to make waves.
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